Everyone who reads this has experienced it at some point in their lives. As with life, not everything will go according to plan. You tend to make mistakes and fail. So, how does this make you feel? You feel depressed, defeated, and little by little, you start to feel sorry for yourself. Without our fault, things are simply not going as well as you hoped they would.
“Self-pity is very easy to damage non-prescription drugs; it is addictive, gives temporary pleasure, and separates the victim from the truth. ”- John Gardner
All of this is normal. It feels bad when you are stuck in this situation for too long.
However, the situation can be dangerous if you become so self-centered that you become part of it. The first step to improving is to see if you are addicted to feeling this way.
This guide aims to help you back up by giving you all the advice you need to fight such a powerful feeling.
Feeling Peaceful With Yourself: Knowing When to Stand
“It’s okay to sit in your empathy pot all the time. Just be sure to take a shower when you’re done, Mrs. Miracle. ”- Debbie Macomber
Is it wrong to feel sorry for ourselves?
The answer is no. It is good to feel sorry for yourself because it is a natural human experience. It becomes worse when you start to eat too much, to the point that you throw large groups of pity over and over again. After all, if you experience it, there is a lot of exaggeration involved.
You magnify your misfortune beyond what it is. Deep feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness overwhelm your condition. This feeling may be accompanied by the belief that no one understands you, that you are not happy despite the hard work you and your loved ones do.
You may even start to think that you will never find anything useful in your life. This destructive thinking can push you to the world in search of attention and compassion. However, not many people will see it as they are consumed by their own thoughts, feelings, and problems.
People are there, they are facing their own problems and problems, and that is just the truth. You have to work on getting out of the black hole yourself. Feeling privileged or abused – as if things were better for everyone else than you – will not get you anywhere.
Better yet, turn your emotions into positive ones. Use it to produce brilliant energy that works for you in more than one way. The compassionate team will continue to be unsatisfactory, leaving a gap that you cannot fill. But it can also be the beginning of something much needed.
You can turn your self-consciousness into passion so that you can grow and challenge yourself instead of wasting valuable time unproductively.
7 Steps to Helping You Feel Free to Apologize
“Self-pity, and your condition are not just a waste of time but a bad habit,” – Dale Carnegie
Self-pity has a second great benefit. When you are immersed in self-pity, you feel a bit of a rush as you feel good right now. You feel free to complain and sigh and moan as much as you want.
However, it is only temporary. You will see that it is not enough, and that is when you start to feel addicted.
Here are a few tips on how to express your feelings through appropriate channels.
- Focus on your breathing
When you experience negative feelings of self-pity, try to calm your mind and body. This way, you can think clearly and have a high head.
How can you do this easily? Sit down and close your eyes. After that, breathe in through your nose, holding it for a few seconds. then let it go a little.
Don’t let any other thought get in at this point. Focus only on the air that enters or exits your lungs. To avoid completing the exercise too late or too early, you can set a two-minute timer on your smartphone.
Breathing may seem insignificant, but it helps to relax the mind. Deep breathing improves our ability to memorize, concentrate, and concentrate. That burst of oxygen going to your brain will help you achieve the clarity you need right then and there. Therefore, instead of letting doubts take over your entire body, spending less than five minutes breathing deeply will bring calm to your system.
- Tap Thanksgiving
The fact is, no matter how bad the situation is, someone is having a terrible time somewhere. Yes, it is necessary to think about someone else’s misfortune, but when you are about to feel sorry for yourself, ask yourself an important question first. Is there anyone out there who has a worse problem than me?
By doing so, you give yourself a sense of perspective. You are not only focusing on your bad situation but also thinking about yourself. Now, follow up on this question with three things you are grateful for. There are some things that you take for granted in your daily life, but they are important to your life.
They don’t have to be that good. You may feel grateful to have a roof over your head, for example. Millions of people do not even have such a small amount. You can enjoy three square meals of clean water every day. Thinking about such things can help you to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
- Accept Hope
What about viewing your condition as one additional lesson in life? It helps to build more with the difficulties you face. For example, if you feel sorry for yourself because you lost a third-place promotional site, look for a hopeful side. Ask the right questions: Why is my dream come true?
How can I get it right?
Yes, you are allowed to feel the pain of losing something so important to your career, but think about what it might be like in the end. Imagine for a second you were transposed into the karmic driven world of Earl.
A sense of hope is probably all you need to find hidden flaws that deny you something you really want and give you the strength to try again. View those moments of failure as an opportunity to learn a lesson that transforms the game rather than the door to the world of self-pity.
- Accept Emotions
Remember that it is only natural to feel sorry for yourself. He is a person, and it is all part of our mind. Therefore, do not waste your energy on fighting it. Get ready for that moment of weakness when you see everything with the wrong lens.
However, set a deadline. Giving yourself time to absorb emotions allows you to take a closer look at what happened. This condition may have caused shock, panic, or strong emotions, but it is now. We are all accustomed to some of the situations in which we have tried to push our emotions into believing that we have the power to continue as if nothing had happened. How did that happen? Most of the time, it never ends well.
Pushing aside emotions can make them appear unexpected at times when you are not ready to deal with them. It is very common to see people hide their feelings because they do not want to appear weak. Still, denying your experience will not erase them.
You become a hero in the face of such adversity and move on with courage. Feel free to cry the river, but when you are done, build a bridge over it. Or just for ten minutes, taste that moment and dust off as you focus on moving forward again.
- Lend Someone A Helping Hand
One key word for self-pity is “self.” When you feel it, you focus on one person: you. Have you ever considered directing all that attention to someone else? Focus on adding value to someone else. Whether it’s a close friend or a random stranger, it doesn’t matter.
The important thing is that you have that time of rest to find a solution to someone else’s problem or to lend a listening ear. It will get you out of your head, and you will have the added benefit of feeling good when you sincerely help others. It’s amazing to see a person’s face light up and you know it’s because of you.
Therefore, this action does not have to be dramatic. You can help by helping the person with a walk or by giving important advice on an important decision. Alternatively, you can just listen while they download. Kindness can work wonders, and it can help you to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
- Take the Social Media Hiatus
We all know the pressure that comes with social media. In these platforms, everyone is focused on providing the illusion of complete health. Happy faces, countless holiday photos, and impeccable family photos can make a huge difference in your self-esteem.
Many people begin to feel sorry for themselves when they believe that everyone around them is doing better than they are. In the meantime, taking a break from social media is rewarding. You only see what people want to see, and you do not want the life of a hypocrite to diminish what you have gained yourself.
Communication hiatus allows you to dedicate some time to yourself. Engage in other activities to do that. You can try to watch movies, read a few books, socialize with your loved ones, or have a fun pastime. It’s all up to you.
- Set Realistic Goals
Your attitude makes a big difference. When you feel that you do not have the strength to change because of your fearsome attitude, try to break it down. The work looks invincible until it breaks into pieces with a bite scale. It is the same with your goals.
Take some time to “me” and think about what you want to change about yourself. Think about how you can improve your situation. Why do you feel sorry for yourself? Say, it may be because you believe that everyone in your office hates you.
After that, sit down and get your pen. Why do you believe they don’t like you? What mistakes do you have that may be contributing to the problem? It should not take more than a few minutes to think of a few steps you can take to change this, especially if you plan for one change a day.
Change can be as simple as a smile, using daily words of encouragement, and being more effective in your decision-making process. No matter how small it may seem, it will make a big difference in time. One day, you will wake up and think you have become a completely different person.
Still, it is an endless process that seems easy because you have broken it. With this, you will feel stronger and confident enough to see your life in a better light.
Preventing self-pity is not impossible. Get started with the simple strategies above and overcome negligence successfully. All it takes is the determination and the equal strength to do the job. You can do this.
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