There is no simple cure for heartache.
It’s just not there. Sometimes you have to go with it, feel it, and perhaps most importantly, learn from it so you can relax and move on.
As a relationship coach, there are some topics that I am often asked about by those I train, but the topic is the topic that most of my clients deal with most is the power of heartbreak. It is paralyzing, paralyzing spiritually and physically, and it can bring back even the most powerful of us.
Here are 7 lessons I have learned from heartache that will help you move forward:
- It’s not always about you.
It is difficult when a loved one chooses not to. It can be painful whether you are in love, married, have the same or similar children. The person who cuts the emotional plug on you can take you to places you never thought possible. But here’s what I want you to remove and listen carefully. Sometimes someone else’s actions of not being with you or continuing to love you are not always related to you. Sometimes it’s actually about them. Others have a limit on the emotional strength of an unbreakable bond of love, especially in a cooperative sense.
Others have emotional burdens that prevent them from having meaningful and healthy relationships. And sometimes, when unfortunately, you end up being a hostage damage. If there is a pattern they have told you about their previous relationship and the normal thread usually ends and they have not taken any accountability, the pattern is most likely related to them.
- Everyone you love does not live forever.
People come into your life for a variety of reasons. And no matter how much you hate someone you love, the point is, you have something to love about him or her. There was something they taught you, helped you find it for yourself, or brought it to the table you knew. As you face the end of your relationship with them, I want you to change your mind and not focus on the pain of separation from time to time to the lessons they have brought you. This is important because it leads to my next revelation about separation.
- In a relationship and oneness, there is a lesson.
Sometimes the person you love right now is teaching you something that will help prepare you for that person you were meant to be in a long-term relationship with. I know you may not want to hear this, but the beauty of a relationship is that you read what you like, what you don’t like, what you don’t appreciate, what you don’t appreciate. There are many trials and tribulations and a direct learning curve. But it also makes it easier for you to distinguish between what you want and what you do not want.
In other words, you have to be smart in every relationship you have, take away the time wasted on people who aren’t ready or who don’t fit in with you. In short, every failed relationship, if you learn the necessary lesson, should bring you closer to what you want.
- Don’t lose what you once thought was the love of your life, but it’s better to love than not to love.
I feel that there are different kinds of love that you will experience in your life. Some will feel a lot of love. While some may not feel like they are too friendly. And then some relationships can exist between a mixture of certain love, fun, and strong friendships. When you are in your 20s your first love will feel different because it is your first love. Most likely it will not be reversed in the same way as in the next relationship so it is important that you do not chase that same feeling or feel that you do not feel that way exactly that it is not love.
It is your first taste of how love feels, so after you have this feeling the next love will love and may not feel different. It does not mean that they are better or worse than your first love. They will just feel different because you will change and be in a different mental and emotional environment that will complement your relationship with someone else. The good thing is that when you are in a relationship you understand that being in danger is part of feeling and showing love. And that in itself is a great first step in opening up to love again.
- Sometimes what you thought love was not really love.
You may be confused about what love is because it depends on our first experience and the manifestation of a loving relationship. And depending on how you learned about it or saw it, you can easily find it wrong. For example, if you see a relationship that is rated around you, it’s easy to see this as work. So say you fell in love with someone who was spiritually, verbally, and / or physically or who had personal problems of drug abuse but you love them, this love experience may not have been the healthiest way to love, but if you all know or know, it lays the ground for what you would think love .
In short, your first experience of this kind of ineffective love has ruined your future view of what you thought love was and you may have repeated this over and over again in a subsequent relationship. And while this law is very extreme it can apply if you do not see the relationship and you have to build what you think the relationship is or if you see your parents divorced, growing up in a single-parent home, etc. The point is no one teaches us to build healthy relationships so sometimes it takes a while before we are ready.
- Separation can be a reset of love.
Yes, a breakup can be just what you need. It will be painful. It will be painful to get out of one’s life. But strangely enough, you may have noticed that there are red flags in your relationship. However, you may have ignored them. You have tried to impersonate your positive feelings that something is wrong with your significant other.
However, if you have listened to your inner voice and left the relationship or the relationship ended, your life may change in important ways. The lesson here
that sometimes breaking up with someone who doesn’t suit you can actually be a reset of your self-esteem and the journey you need to complete that leads me to my final point.
- When you are in a relationship, there is someone you often forget about.
That could be YOU! Heartbreak is hard, but the distance to an unhealthy relationship has its benefits. One of them is time to focus on you. Demonstrating self-love and self-care is critical to your continued growth, development, and ability to love again. When you are comfortable with being alone, it allows you to make the right choices in order to make the most of your next relationship.
If you have a heart attack, I want you to know that things will get better. Eventually you will recover and come out strong on the other side.
It all happens for a reason and losing the love of someone who is important to you does not mean that you will never have the experience of dating and someone who can be important to you. Heartache, while painful at first, can also help you grow, increase your self-esteem and allow you to find love with the right person for you.
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