Wherever I went, bullies seemed to follow me. Whether it was school, work or family, I never seemed to find any kind of escape. For years, I had been stuck in a victim’s mind, constantly wondering what I could do to deserve this kind of behavior. I have decided to turn my struggle into a personal growth strategy to help others who may have been silent and silent about what I have done.
Here are some of the most important human development lessons I have learned from my stressful experience:
- Be a victim
Be a victim but enter an expiration date early for this. Know that it is good to feel sorry for yourself; It’s okay to reassure yourself by confirming that you didn’t deserve what happened to you. This will help you to give yourself the compassion you need at that moment. Recognizing the injury and reassuring are the first steps that begin the treatment process, but the important thing is not to try to stay too long otherwise you will cling to the victim’s mind.
This is a common question – why did this happen to me? Are the stars miserable or is this karma skiing the last donation from the party? Instead of dwelling on negative events, do what is practical to cope with each problem. Sometimes, it can be as simple as finding your voice and setting boundaries. All difficult situations provide an opportunity to learn.
- Focus on the lesson, not on the pain
Whenever you face a difficult situation, ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” Often, when we are drowning in difficult situations, we cannot see the light and we are afraid that any light would be a helpful train. The best way to deal with this fear is to work on your thoughts. Usually, the lesson falls under one of the following categories: patience, perseverance, consistency and my favorite – to stay true to what you are.
- Control the controls
In all difficult situations, there are always factors that you can control: your answers, your attitude, and your actions. Using what you can control, redirect your energy to WHAT YOU CAN do instead of what you can do. Sometimes, all you have to do is end your day and give everything you can. This helps build confidence and confidence.
“Once your thinking has changed, everything outside will change along with it.” – Steve Maraboli
- You do it yourself
It is a natural human desire to be loved by those around us. Avoid trying to change your identity based on what others say about you. It is very tempting to do this because we all want to feel welcome and we want to feel that we belong. The more you do, the more you will attract people who are “real” to you.
- It is not yours
When people constantly criticize you, know that they are fighting against their demons and are starting easily. It is not the real reason for their hurtful behavior, they are full of fear, anger and hurt that they inflict on others. You can only give what you have and if fear, anger and injury are all you have, the only place you will work.
- You have the power to choose
It is easy to forget that we always have the power to make our own choices and, while our circumstances may be difficult, we can still make wise decisions so that we do not fall victim to our circumstances. We must not forget this power because it keeps us floating and breathing when we are inundated with floodwaters.
- Revenge is not the answer
While it is normal and human to desire revenge on those who have hurt us, it is important that you know that what we wish for others, is holding us back. Wanting your criminals to fight the constant sneezing while you are stuck in traffic that controls explosive diarrhea may give you a moment of satisfaction, but is this something you are willing to risk getting back to? Certainly not me. Simply put – negligence breeds indifference while self-esteem breeds self-esteem. Remember, you have a choice.
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” – Wayne Dyer
Don’t breathe too much. Yes, forgive those who have hurt you. Why? It does not at all relieve them of the pain that they have caused, but it does release you from the chains of indifference that bind you and benefit you in a place that prevents you from continuing. How do you forgive? Ask for any higher power you believe in to filter out those who have hurt you in your life, send them blessings and healing wherever they may need you in their lives while and bless you with good results for all of you.
I have used this method personally and I swear. Sending blessings and healing while asking for good results, results in all these good things that happen to you as well. Giving with mirrors to you. You have the power to forgive, let it go. This is a choice that you also have the power to choose.
The next time you feel stuck and frustrated by your circumstances, revisit these self-improvement lessons and apply them to your unique situation. You’ll be glad you did.
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